Things I’ve Done….(Poem)

I’ve rescued a princess
(she wasn’t in another castle that time)
I’ve taken up a whip
and used it to kill Dracula
(several times)
I’ve climbed the tallest buildings in Italy
killed a man via hidden blade to the head
(it was very satisfying)
I’ve killed the one who murdered the Black Dahlia
(he was hiding behind a gravestone, the coward!)
I’ve had an argument with a stop sign
I’ve killed dragons by shouting at them
I’ve been a monster slayer
(Silver or steel?)
I’ve saved the galaxy
no less than three times
(I’ll miss you, Normandy!)
I’ve recruited the 108 Stars of Destiny
(that was difficult)
I flirted with Bann Teagan
he didn’t care that I was an elf
or a lesbian
(I didn’t care either)
I’ve learned that “…Whatever”
is apparently endearing
especially to sorceresses
and that all my problems can be solved
with tarot cards
and parts of myself
which wage war with Shadows
Perhaps these experiences
are not so useful
except when a life
is enriched
through play

(If you can name every game I referenced in that poem, I will be impressed.)

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