The Politics of Food

[I’d hate to ruin a discussion about something as wonderful as food with very rude people, but this post may be triggery re: fat-shaming.]

Happy fall, everyone! I love this season! There’s something so magical about fall. The air is cool and crisp, leaves change colour and fall off, leaving skeletal trees behind, neither summer’s heat nor winter’s chill.

Oh, and of course, there’s the food.

The second Monday in October is Thanksgiving in Canada, and that means inviting a whole bunch of people over for turkey, stuffing, cranberry sauce, mashed potatoes (with or without gravy) and more. Thanksgiving and Christmas are the only times in the year when my mom thinks to buy cranberries, which makes it special for me. In my area, we also have Oktoberfest  which is a nice excuse to drink beer, eat sausage, and celebrate the fact that we were once not named after a guy who thought concentration camps were a fantastic idea.

Oh, and of course, there’s Hallowe’en, the only time of year when kids are encouraged to eat sweet things that are very bad for them.

I enjoy eating. There’s a certain pleasure in biting into an apple and feeling the juices drip down my chin. (Yes, sometimes I eat messily for the fun of it.) One thing I’m really sick of, though, is how there seem to be people who have made it their mission in life to make sure other people don’t enjoy their food.

I suspect you’ve all heard these before: X causes cancer, Y will rot your brain, stop eating Z, you’re slowly killing yourself. The latest punching bag in this war on food is wheat, no, not just highly processed, bleached wheat, wheat in general. That’s not even going into the fad diets, the weight loss pills, and the calorie-counting. One of my women’s studies professors told us about an overweight friend of hers who was eating an ice cream cone at the mall, only to have someone come along and say (and I swear this is true) “You should not be eating that….”

Yes, you can actually be that rude. I heard that anecdote years ago, and I can still hear her telling it. That kind of behaviour is fucking disgraceful. I could go on about fat-shaming, so I will. Here’s something that happened to me one day in the mall:

Me: *browsing games at GameStop*

Person A: Hmm, maybe I should get a Wii.

Person B: Yeah, that would be a good idea.

Person A: I really need to exercise more. I mean, I was never as big as that girl over there….

Yeah, um, lady? You might want to think twice about talking smack about the only girl in the store when she’s RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU, just because she has her head down does not make her deaf.

I don’t like to demean other women like this, but I could have smacked that bitch, seriously. I didn’t say anything, though I did walk out of the store.

Anyways, I went off on a tangent there, so food….

It’s one thing to be concerned if something you might have bought is contaminated with E. coli, but this maddening “STOP EATING X OR YOU’RE MURDERING YOUR LIVER!” is just…just….

Fuck that noise, seriously.

Full disclaimer: I’m an overweight (or as I like to say, “fat”) middle class twenty-something living in Ontario, Canada. I try to exercise every day, and have been slowly modifying my diet to include more things in the fruit and vegetables department (things I like: spinach, lettuces, leafy greens in general, garlic and onion, most fruits excepting tomatoes unless they’re in something, things I hate: broccoli, cauliflower, cabbages in general, almost everything else). I eat a lot of chicken and seafood (especially shellfish), pork and beef less so. I love dairy products, honey, and the occasional egg (depends on how they’re cooked). I’m allergic to peanuts, I’ll eat other nuts, but I don’t really like them. I enjoy all kinds of grain products. I love whole wheat pasta and pizza crust, but hate whole wheat bread. I drink more water now than ever, occasionally have a bit of fruit juice, and have soft drinks at parties or restaurants. I very rarely have tea (too bitter), don’t like coffee, and have never touched alcohol (except for that one family reunion when I was like, twelve, drank a big glass of rum and orange juice, got a killer headache, vowed never to do that again). I used to drink lots of sugar water juice from juice boxes, but I cut those out, same with ice cream (exceptions: Dairy Queen) which I kind of just….stopped enjoying.

I’m telling you all this so that you know exactly where I’m coming from, and because no discussion about food would be complete without taking about meat-eating and the not eating thereof.

This is a very contentious topic, so let’s get something straight, right now. If you have had to give up certain foods for health reasons, or you personally choose not to consume animal products (or just not to consume meat) for ethical reasons (or, say, your deities have told you “do not eat this thing”), I have no issue with you. Quite frankly, it’s none of my business what you choose to eat or not eat for whatever reason.

But what I really don’t like are those extremists who assume that I am a soulless monster because I’m an omnivore. Yes, PETA, I’m glaring in your general direction, you and your sexist marketing campaigns and your founder being all “but I need insulin shots (developed from animal testing) to save animals” bullshit hypocrisy. It’s not just PETA, though. While I wouldn’t label her an extremist, not by a long shot, Amber K. devotes a section of her book True Magick to basically saying that vegetarians make more powerful magicians. (Pgs. 103-6)

Did you hear that, my fellow omnivores? We all suck at magic! (Seriously though, I’d like to see someone with that mindset approach a deity of the hunt with a bowl of gazpacho, I predict it will go well.)

Now, as an omnivore myself, I do think that the problem is not that we eat meat, but that we eat too much meat and we treat the animals that give us our meat like shit. Unfortunately, not all of us can afford (or are able to) buy chickens who have been raised with tender loving care by local farmers. No, sorry, extremists, it’s not just an issue of “meat-eaters are all stupid and fat!” it’s also an ability issue, a class/socio-economic issue, as well as an issue of basic biology. This shit is waaaay more complicated than simply “why can’t everyone eat vegetables all the time?” And you know what? My body isn’t yours, stop fucking policing it like it is.

I could spend all day talking about matters of food. I mentioned this in a past post, but one of my fourth year religion courses was all about food and religion. OMFGs, this topic is so much more nuanced than “all Buddhists are vegetarians” (the Dalai Lama eats meat, now shut up). The professor who taught that course was planning to write a book on religion and food, but I don’t know if he ever got around to it. You know a course is awesome when it talks about Southern US barbeque culture as a means of binding together as a Christian community (I’m serious, I can find that article if anyone’s interested).

So, yeah, this topic is huuuuuge, so I think all I’m going to say for now is: Whatever you’re eating, enjoy it, enjoy the Hel out of it.

Hardcore PC Gamers: A Rant

[Trigger warning for homophobia, general warning for idiocy.]

In a previous post, I mentioned Obsidian Entertainment’s Project Eternity, an old-school isometric RPG intended to be a homage to the Infinity Engine games (Baldur’s Gate, Icewind Dale, and Planescape: Torment, mainly). I don’t usually donate to Kickstarter (which, TBH, seems like it would be a hotbed for shady types) and I haven’t played very many Obsidian games. What I have played, though, was interesting enough that I’d like to see more of it.

What’s that? This is going to be an original IP? As in, it’s not going to be based on D&D? DO WANT!

The problem, however, is not with the game, it’s with the fans.

I’m saying this as a PC gamer myself, but PC gamers (especially RPG fans) are the most elitist, entitled gamers I’ve ever had the displeasure of meeting, and news of this project has them all crawling out of their Caves of Utter Loneliness to spew their bile all over the place.

Sadly, I did expect the homophobes (with some of the nicer comments being to the effect of “NO HOMO! GO BACK TO THE BIOWARE FORUMS!” to troll spew as soon as the word “romance” was mentioned (although, to be fair, the community doesn’t seem too keen on romance in general, and I’d honestly rather not have it than only have romances for heterosexuals) the issue I have is with the idea that Obsidian is “pandering to console players” or “pandering to casual gamers”.

The devs announce they might be including the option for a character to be multiclass? “Pandering to the console gamer.”

The devs including easy mode? “Pandering to the casual gamer.”

The devs doing anything in any way different from the old Infinity Engine games? “Pandering, I tell you! PANDERING!”

I swear, some of these imbeciles “fans” want nothing less than an exact clone of games that are now over a decade old. They don’t want a hardcore RPG in the spirit of the old IE games, they want Baldur’s Gate 3. You know what the real kicker is, though? THEY HAD EASY MODE AND MULTICLASSING IN THE ORIGINAL GAMES!


Seriously, they even blew up over the decision to include text-based translations in French, Spanish, and German, because MORE PEOPLE LIKING OUR GAMES IS A TERRIBLE THING, EVERYONE!

Now, let’s backtrack a little. I understand where these fans are coming from (to a point). This particular fan looks at modern RPGs and sees simplistic combat, gratuitous T&A and assertions that “gamers don’t read, why put in so much dialogue if they won’t read it?” and long for the days when there wasn’t a whole lot of voice acting and combat required a bit more planning then “spam X until you win”. I understand that, what I don’t understand is all the screaming that happens when Obsidian tries to introduce ANY innovation at all. What’s really hilarious is the constant cries for “realism” in a fantasy RPG like the member who wants a fiendishly complicated lockpicking system.

Yes, sadly, some people have no life, they have so little life that they are able to complicate something as simple as video game lockpicking.

I can tell I will have great fun watching the fans scream as more information about the game becomes apparent. Personally, I’m looking forward to the day one of them declares that the game is RUINED FOREVER because [insert list of ways Project Eternity is not exactly like Baldur’s Gate and related games].

Cry moar, (mostly) fanboys, seriously.

Adventures in Skyrim

[Note: For my one hundredth post, I decided to do something a little different and roleplay a session of Skyrim as if I were a fiercely pro-Stormcloak racist highly exaggerated fundie Heathen. Before I begin, note that this session will contain SPOILERS FOR THE COMPANIONS FACTION and is graphics heavy (which is why I’m cutting it).

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Review: Growlanser: Wayfarer of Time

The box art, no floating heads here!

Growlanser: Wayfarer of Time is a strategy RPG for the PSP developed by Career Soft and published by Atlus. It was originally released for the PlayStation 2 back in 2oo3, and is actually the fourth game in the Growlanser series. This is the first time this entry has been released outside of Japan.

That was the extent of my knowledge coming into this game. Growlanser is one of those series that is hugely popular in Japan and virtually unknown in North America, and reviews I’d seen for the previous games in the series were….not so great. I usually like to play series in sequential order, but upon hearing that Wayfarer of Time had it’s own self-contained story, I decided to give it a go. What can I say? I like JRPGs.

So, for those of you who are like me and have no idea what this game is about, here’s the scoop: You play Crevanille, a “Ruin Child” (children who were put into stasis by a long-dead civilization) who was raised by a mercenary company. The mercenaries have come to the continent of Noyeval to see if there’s any profit to be gained from a war between it’s four nations: highly militarized (and democratic) Dulkheim, the Kingdom of Iglesias, the Kingdom of Markelay, and the Kingdom of Valkania (who isn’t so much warring as it is sitting around on the sidelines). Against the backdrop of these warring powers, mysterious beings known as Angels have been turning up and leaving a path of destruction in their wake, to what purpose is anyone’s guess.

The back of the box tries to sell the whole “chosen one” schtick that we’ve seen before, but the game is much more complex than that. If I were to say one thing about this game, I’d say that it definitely has an aura of mystery. Who are the Ruin Children, and what is their purpose? What do the Angels want? Can’t everyone just get together and talk things out? So far there are a lot of unanswered questions, and I was practically glued to my seat and lapping this game up until my battery died and I had to wait to charge it up again. Many critics have complained that the game takes a while to really get going, and this is true–but then again, it’s true for many JRPGs–but once it does, it grabs you and refuses to let go. The other complaint I heard is that there’s a lot of reading. Seriously, have any of the people writing these reviews actually played a JRPG before? That’s like complaining that a sandbox game gives you too much freedom to explore! Fortunately, for those of us who like reading, there’s some great writing in this game, and Atlus did a great job with the localization.

One feature I’d like to highlight is the way your choices shape Crevanille’s personality and his relationships with other characters. Too often in JRPGs, the difference between one choice and another is a line of text and little else. I’ve been choosing the “nice” options when they’ve come up in conversation, and, as a result, some of the “jerkass” options (such as leaving a girl you just rescued alone in the woods or being overly critical of your best friend) have actually been greyed out. I’m playing this game without a walkthrough, so I can’t really say how my choices have really impacted my game without playing through a second time, but I’m interested to see if my choices do impact the game in the long term. So far, I’m skeptical, but it’s interesting how the game actually seems to be tracking my choices.

As far as the combat system goes, for everyone out there who hates grid-based combat, I’m happy to report that there are no grids in this game. The game gives you a surprising amount of freedom in combat, and you can change orders for your characters on the fly. There’s also the rings system, which is something like the Materia system from Final Fantasy VII. Rings have different slots that you can use to equip spellstones (magic and skills). Some spellstones give you bonuses to movement speed or that character’s attributes, others give “knacks” (skills) and others give you access to, well, spells.Appropriate for a strategy RPG, the game rewards you for thinking strategically rather than charging an enemy you can’t possibly win against. In one battle, I was tasked with keeping the enemy away from some important research. I was having trouble with this mission until I remembered that the levers on the walls of the building I was defending would throw up barricades to buy the NPCs time to construct a barricade of their own inside the research room. The funny thing was that I was playing with these same levers awhile back, wondering what they were for, Chekhov’s gun, anyone? One complaint that other reviewers had was that the AI was as dumb as a post, but I haven’t found that to be the case so far. All of the NPCs ran when they should have and one was very helpful casting curative magic when I needed it. If one of them died, well, that was due to my blundering.

Speaking of which, this game can be challenging at times, but it seldom throws anything at you that you can’t handle. (Protip: If your attacks are ever doing 1 point of damage, try something else or run!) Well, what did you expect, it’s an Atlus game, and Atlus USA isn’t exactly known for publishing games that are cakewalks.  Graphics wise, well, this game was originally published on the PS2, so the graphics aren’t particularly revolutionary. The in game music is great, not as memorable as, say, Final Fantasy, but that’s not to say that it’s terrible.

In summary, I don’t know why critics are hating on this game so much. Yes, I suppose the characters run the gamut of JRPG stereotypes (although the moment I decided I really liked this game was when two of the most stereotypical characters ended up kicking the bucket, because I am a horrible person), and there’s nothing particularly original about it (although the Ruin Children are a nice science fictiony touch in an otherwise Standard JRPG setting). I wouldn’t say it’s exactly like if Tactics Ogre: Let Us Cling Together and Suikoden had a baby, but there are definitely parts of this game that remind me of both of those. Overall, I’d say pick this one up if you like a well-written story with a metric ton of politicking and mysteries to solve and player choices that actually seem to matter.

Singleplayer and Multiplayer: My Stance

It has come to my attention today that therootofallgamingevil EA is refusing to publish games that are single-player only. I think this is a monumentally stupid decision, but then again, between their sexist marketing campaigns and the craptastic ending of Mass Effect 3 (although, to be fair, I was satisfied with the director’s cut DLC), not to mention forcing players to play multiplayer in order to get the best possible ending for Shepard, I’m not exactly enamored with EA these days.

But this latest decision, ye gods, where do I begin?

Okay, first there’s my bias to consider. I’m honestly not a big fan of multiplayer modes. I will play multiplayer to try it, but I expect that the single-player campaign will be the “meat” of the experience, and, for the most part, this is what happens.

But I can’t help but feel that EA has shot itself in the foot on this one.

I’m not an expert on game design, but even I know if you want to add multiplayer, even crappy tacked on multiplayer, that means diverting funds that would have been used to add content to single-player mode, and, call me crazy, but I’d much rather have an engaging single-player mode with no multiplayer, than spend time wondering about how much content the developer had to cut from the single-player campaign to make such a craptacular multiplayer mode.

What I really didn’t like though, was EA’s president, Frank Gibeau saying things like: “You need to have a connected social experience where you’re part of a large community,” and I honestly couldn’t disagree more. Yes, I think it’s great to play with friends, and make new friends, on the other hand, sometimes this “large community” can be a big pain in the ass, as when players begin harassing other players online (trigger warning: harassment, general assholetry, use caution). This is all assuming that you have a persistent internet connection, of course, as many of these games require you to be online.

So, sorry EA, even though you announced a new Mass Effect and Dragon Age, I’m reserving my excitement for Project Eternity from Obsidian Entertainment (yes, that Obsidian), who actually appear to be listening to their fans instead of the siren song of the almighty dollar.

Tarot Myths

It’s raining today, I’m between writing projects, and I’m bored, so that means another blog post. Since I’m pretty sure I lust after a new tarot deck every week, I thought I’d post something about myths I’ve seen around the internet.

Before I do that, I just want to say that I basically subscribe to what the collective mind at the Aeclectic Tarot forum ( says. If one of the things I list helps you with your readings, use it! I know professional readers who don’t do anything special with their cards before reading, and others who go the whole nine yards. Tarot is your tool, you do what you think is right.

That said, here are some common myths I’ve seen:

Your tarot deck must be wrapped in silk. Some books specify that the bag its in must be black, and that the oracle needs to be kept out of the light. To my knowledge, silk is seen as a “purifying substance” (much like salt) and the black bag is meant to shield it from “negative energy” or the deck must be otherwise shielded from “mundane existence” (keeping it out of the light might also have the practical purpose of making sure the colours don’t fade after repeated use).

With one exception, all of my decks are in their original boxes (the box for my Tarot of Vampyres fell apart). The bag I keep the one exception in has black velvet on the outside and red satin on the inside. I only keep a couple “reading” decks out at a time, so I like displaying the rest on the shelf next to this computer.

Your tarot deck must be cleansed before use. This is just one of many rituals some people like to do to ready their decks for readings  Doreen Virtue’s decks have a ritual where you knock on the cards with your dominant hand (to clear them of other energies they would have picked up during manufacturing and their time on a shelf) touch all the cards (so that they become attuned to your energy) and then say a prayer (which dedicates them to a particular purpose).

As before, none of my decks have been “cleansed” in any way. My Mythical Goddess Tarot came to me with this really strong “machine” scent, which I alleviated somewhat by taking cloves and leaving some in the box with the cards for a day or two, now they smell nice. One thing I do like to do as soon as I get a new deck is touch every card, both to make sure that there are no repeat cards and because it doesn’t feel like these cards are “mine” until I touch them all.

Which brings me to….

Never let anyone else touch your cards. This is one of those “ceremonial magic” rules, of the “no one must touch your tools and pollute them with their ungodly mundane energies” kind. I have to admit, I get a little anxious when someone touches my decks outside of a reading (YOU ARE GOING TO BEND MY CARDS! GAAAAH!) but I’ll often hand the deck to the querent to shuffle, mind you, I don’t really do in-person readings, because I know too much about everyone I do readings for, online readings are great, though.

You must never buy your own deck, it must be received as a gift. I’ll be honest, this is one of those rules that I just think is….dumb. I’m sorry, but seriously, this is one of those rules that stems from the belief that money is evil and HOW DARE YOU CHARGE FOR SPIRITUAL THINGS, YOU TOOL! Honestly, if I had followed this rule, I wouldn’t have ANY decks, much less decks that I like (and I especially wouldn’t have preordered my Victorian Romantic 2nd edition, because DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I PAID FOR IT? DO YOU?! TOO MUCH!) This rule doesn’t take into account people with relatives and friends who would never think of buying them a deck (who may even be staunchly against the idea).

In all honesty, I’ve found the best way to find a deck that you like is to go shopping for it yourself. There’s no guarantee that anyone around you is going to buy that exact deck for you, even if they know you like tarot and you’ve sent them a wish list. I’d much rather buy a deck that I personally like than be gifted one that I hate and be forced to use it because “that’s what the rule says”.

Anyways, those are a few of the most common, there are other rituals people follow, like sleeping with a deck under their pillow. I personally like to do a deck interview spread with each new arrival (after touching all the cards), and I like to put decks back in order when I’m finished, but lately I’ve been leaving them as is.

Oh, and if anyone wants a FREE reading, let me know in the comments, or if you know me from Facebook, bug me there, I could use the practice. I have a bunch of different decks. You can see a partial list here: (at least, I think you can, I can’t remember if AT profiles are viewable by the public). This list doesn’t have my most recent acquisitions though, I also have the Gaian Tarot, Steampunk Tarot (Barbara Moore and Ally Fell), and the Ghosts and Spirits Tarot. Currently, the only deck I have with any kind of “specialty” is my Tarot of Vampyres (Ian Daniels) which LOOOOOVES readings of a romantic nature. Oh, and my Animals Divine Tarot likes doing readings for role-playing characters (specifically, help with plots and character creation). I’m still a novice, though, so if I don’t seem to know what I’m talking about, it’s because I checked the book. 🙂 I’m trying not to check the book.

Also, the decks marked with an asterisk (*) are available for trade. They are all in good condition, though I have to check if the Art of Tarot still has all its cards. I’m also willing to trade my Paulina Tarot. I don’t like it, I just don’t.

Wicca, Mystics, and Game Manuals

Since I am currently lusting after the Book of Shadows Tarot (Lo Scarabeo)–click the link and drool over the artwork–I thought I’d devote a few words to talking about Wicca, more specifically, why some people feel the need to bash it and its adherents.

Let me first start off by saying that I understand why someone might not have the most favourable opinion of Wicca. Yes, there is the unfortunate tendency for the general public to to conflate Wicca with Paganism as a whole. If I had a dollar for every time someone said “All Pagans follow the Rede” or “If you are Pagan, you believe in the Threefold Law,” (this quote, interestingly enough, is an actual quote from a colleague of mine who claimed to be an “atheist Druid” and self-proclaimed expert on all things Pagan), I’d be very rich.

But you know what? That doesn’t excuse some of the condescending comments I’ve heard from certain members of the heathen community, comments like “Why follow a 50 year old tradition when you can follow a 5,000 year old tradition?” or lamenting that people are turning to Wicca instead of the “traditions of their ancestors” in Europe (this was actually a comment in response to a Wild Hunt article about Wiccans in either Lithuania or Estonia). First of all, what 5,000 year tradition? If you can trace an unbroken tradition all the way back to the pre-Christian era, I’m sure there are scholars out there who would like to talk to you. Seriously, the most recent “revival” of Northern European Paganisms occurred in the 60s, YOU ARE EVEN YOUNGER THAN WICCA, YOU DOLTS! Don’t sell me that patronizing bullshit, your religion is not 5,000 years old. You know what? Call up my shade in 5,000 years and then your descendants can brag about their 5,000 year old religion, okay?

Another root of this hostility is the desire to emphasize that magic is not a central part of many non-Wiccan traditions. I don’t think there’s anything inherently wrong with this, but I have to laugh when I hear about people criticizing other people for practicing something like, say, seidr, because “it’s not really seidr because it uses X”. (If you haven’t read it already, go read the post on “Limiting Seidr” at Wane Wyrds here). It’s funny to me because, like their ancestors before them, modern Heathens don’t seem to know what to do with their mystics and magic workers, especially when those same people claim to talk to the deities who supposedly “only talk to important people” (and who, apparently, are so out of touch with the times that they don’t know where California is, I’m serious, this is an actual experience someone posted on a forum).

So these people are called all sorts of names: “fluffy” and “Wiccatru” being two of the most common and least odious I’ve seen. Note that I do think that fluffiness is definitely a problem, not just for Heathens or Wiccans, but Paganism as a whole, but for fuck’s sake, “fluffy bunny” or “Wiccatru” is not code for “someone who disagrees with me”. No, really, it’s not, and for people who claim to be all about the academics, I’ve never seen a community who resorts to using such petty insults so quickly. Yeah, right, bullying people will really improve your standing in the community.

The more I think about it, the more this type of hardcore recon Wicca-basher reminds me of a gamer who reads all the previews and watches all the gameplay videos for a given game and then declares that it’s going to suck before it’s even come out yet, or imagines that they are now somehow an expert at the game when all they’ve been doing is reading about it. Any gamer will tell you that reading about a game and actually playing that game are two different things. You can go on and on about how Skyrim is gorgeous, and show screenshots, but it’s a whole ‘nother thing when you can actually see those majestic landscapes and OMFGS I HATE SABRE CATS!

Seeing this is nothing like seeing it on your own screen.

Or, in short, you can read about a game all you want, but reading is no substitute for actually playing, just like reading is no substitute for actually being a part of that culture. You can go on and on about reconstructing a “worldview” all you want, but the thing is, that world is dead, it’s gone, we don’t live in that sort of world anymore. It just seems so counter-intuitive to me that it’s almost funny. I can understand a desire to shake off the shackles of Christianity, but seriously? You’re using fragmented sources from a Christian perspective that only tells you a small part about how these people lived, and please don’t start with me about how archaeology tells you things. Archaeological finds are subject to interpretation (and the bias of their interpreter) and it’s not like these objects are clearly labeled (unless you’re talking about certain Greek vases, because figures were often labelled with their names).

Take this figure, for example:


I heard someone say, not too long ago, that this figure “couldn’t be Odin in a dress, because it’s female”. Where the fuck is this person’s time machine that they know without a doubt who is being depicted? Especially since WE HAVE STORIES WHERE ODIN PUTS ON A DRESS TO LEARN SEIDR! Oh, wait, let me guess, that story’s been Christianized, your argument is invalid. Really? Look, maybe it is Odin, maybe it’s a seidrman, and maybe it’s a bearded seidkona, maybe it’s someone I haven’t considered, but you know, it looks suspiciously like it’s Odin in a dress. It’s like someone’s upset because archaeology didn’t neatly line up with their expectations.

Movie Review: ParaNorman

Note: This review will contain SPOILERS for ParaNorman, so if you don’t want to know what happens in the movie, don’t click on the jump. In fact, maybe you better ignore this post entirely.

Anyways, I don’t often go to the movies, but this time was one of the exceptions. I went with my mom, and we went to a local independent theatre (seats are okay, cup holders are too big, tickets are cheap, popcorn is good) because my mom doesn’t like the mainstream theatres because they’re too loud. The nice thing about going to the movies at this theatre though, was that there were only about five other people in there–on a Sunday afternoon–so you can pretty much sit wherever you want and you don’t have to worry about the seats being packed if you’re late.

It’s pretty sweet.

In case you can’t tell from the title, I went to see ParaNorman, here’s a brief synopsis:

In ParaNorman, a small town comes under siege by zombies. Who can it call? Only misunderstood local boy Norman (voiced by Kodi Smit-McPhee), who is able to speak with the dead. In addition to the zombies, he’ll have to take on ghosts, witches and, worst of all, moronic grown-ups, to save his town from a centuries-old curse. But this young ghoul whisperer may find his paranormal activities pushed to their otherworldly limits.

Hit the jump for my impressions of the movie (SPOILERS AHOY!)….

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