Hardcore PC Gamers: A Rant

[Trigger warning for homophobia, general warning for idiocy.]

In a previous post, I mentioned Obsidian Entertainment’s Project Eternity, an old-school isometric RPG intended to be a homage to the Infinity Engine games (Baldur’s Gate, Icewind Dale, and Planescape: Torment, mainly). I don’t usually donate to Kickstarter (which, TBH, seems like it would be a hotbed for shady types) and I haven’t played very many Obsidian games. What I have played, though, was interesting enough that I’d like to see more of it.

What’s that? This is going to be an original IP? As in, it’s not going to be based on D&D? DO WANT!

The problem, however, is not with the game, it’s with the fans.

I’m saying this as a PC gamer myself, but PC gamers (especially RPG fans) are the most elitist, entitled gamers I’ve ever had the displeasure of meeting, and news of this project has them all crawling out of their Caves of Utter Loneliness to spew their bile all over the place.

Sadly, I did expect the homophobes (with some of the nicer comments being to the effect of “NO HOMO! GO BACK TO THE BIOWARE FORUMS!” to troll spew as soon as the word “romance” was mentioned (although, to be fair, the community doesn’t seem too keen on romance in general, and I’d honestly rather not have it than only have romances for heterosexuals) the issue I have is with the idea that Obsidian is “pandering to console players” or “pandering to casual gamers”.

The devs announce they might be including the option for a character to be multiclass? “Pandering to the console gamer.”

The devs including easy mode? “Pandering to the casual gamer.”

The devs doing anything in any way different from the old Infinity Engine games? “Pandering, I tell you! PANDERING!”

I swear, some of these imbeciles “fans” want nothing less than an exact clone of games that are now over a decade old. They don’t want a hardcore RPG in the spirit of the old IE games, they want Baldur’s Gate 3. You know what the real kicker is, though? THEY HAD EASY MODE AND MULTICLASSING IN THE ORIGINAL GAMES!

In short, Hardcore PC Gamers(TM) are whinging because OMFGs OBSIDIAN ISN’T MAKING AN RPG JUST FOR US! HOW DARE THEY CONSIDER WHAT OTHER PEOPLE MIGHT WANT!

Seriously, they even blew up over the decision to include text-based translations in French, Spanish, and German, because MORE PEOPLE LIKING OUR GAMES IS A TERRIBLE THING, EVERYONE!

Now, let’s backtrack a little. I understand where these fans are coming from (to a point). This particular fan looks at modern RPGs and sees simplistic combat, gratuitous T&A and assertions that “gamers don’t read, why put in so much dialogue if they won’t read it?” and long for the days when there wasn’t a whole lot of voice acting and combat required a bit more planning then “spam X until you win”. I understand that, what I don’t understand is all the screaming that happens when Obsidian tries to introduce ANY innovation at all. What’s really hilarious is the constant cries for “realism” in a fantasy RPG like the member who wants a fiendishly complicated lockpicking system.

Yes, sadly, some people have no life, they have so little life that they are able to complicate something as simple as video game lockpicking.

I can tell I will have great fun watching the fans scream as more information about the game becomes apparent. Personally, I’m looking forward to the day one of them declares that the game is RUINED FOREVER because [insert list of ways Project Eternity is not exactly like Baldur’s Gate and related games].

Cry moar, (mostly) fanboys, seriously.

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