I’m Sorry I Didn’t Put Up Any Writing Today….

[Warning: The following discusses poop, and animals.]

Today I went to my brother’s house. My brother has a new pet, a ball python named Fluffy. I love snakes, but my mom won’t let me have one as a pet because she is terrified of them.

So when my brother is like “Do you want to hold Fluffy?” I’m all like “Yus….”

So here I am holding Fluffy, talking to him and such–when suddenly I feel something wet on the front of my dress.

At first I thought it was rain–and then I looked down.

Snake shit, snake shit everywhere!


Needless to say, my dress went in the laundry when I got home and I scrubbed my thighs like mad. Yeah, i know, my thighs, not sexual at all, right?

And that is the story of how a snake crapped on me.

If you read this and laugh, I hate you so much right now.

2 thoughts on “I’m Sorry I Didn’t Put Up Any Writing Today….

  1. I’m sorry the snake crapped all over you. I had it happen to me with my Ball Python named Voodoo (he lives in Oregon with an old friend). I was told they didn’t know what gender he was, so I tried to figure it out myself.

    Basing this off of videos online and advice from a reptile forum, I squeezed what shouldn’t have been squeezed, and ended up with hot, runny snake poo/pee running down my arms and all over my lap and clothes.

    I got laughed at for about a week, and it took 2 days of scrubbing my skin for the smell to dissipate. I feel your pain. I also love snakes with a burning squeeful passion, but my husband is afraid of them as well, so no snakes allowed in our house. Unless it is in the form of a tattoo.

    I told my husband what I was reading, and he said the snake must have been really comfortable, it is usually what happens when babies relax…

  2. I did laugh…but only because I too have been shit on by a snake. It got all over me and my bedspread. The only upside was that she was a 4ft cornsnake, so it wasn’t quite as much poo as if she were larger. But still…..ick!

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