[Warning: The following discusses poop, and animals.]
Today I went to my brother’s house. My brother has a new pet, a ball python named Fluffy. I love snakes, but my mom won’t let me have one as a pet because she is terrified of them.
So when my brother is like “Do you want to hold Fluffy?” I’m all like “Yus….”
So here I am holding Fluffy, talking to him and such–when suddenly I feel something wet on the front of my dress.
At first I thought it was rain–and then I looked down.
Snake shit, snake shit everywhere!
Needless to say, my dress went in the laundry when I got home and I scrubbed my thighs like mad. Yeah, i know, my thighs, not sexual at all, right?
And that is the story of how a snake crapped on me.
If you read this and laugh, I hate you so much right now.