Fire Jewel is Coming….

Fire Jewel is almost ready to be made available for purchase. You’ll just have to hold on a little longer so the proof copies can be checked.

I know it’s been a long time coming, peeps, but it’s ALMOST here! Just be patient and I’ll have a link for you.

The price will be $16 USD + S&H and will be available via Lulu in case you need a head start on saving those pennies.

My Own Version of a “Sponge Cake” Offering

Remember awhile back on tumblr how some people were going ballistic because someone decided to give Loki some sponge cake with whipped cream and strawberries?

Here is what I’m offering Freyja:

1 strawberry that isn’t rotten (the rest of the strawberries are in various states of decay)

1 slice of whole wheat bread with Nutella

1 cinnamon bun I bought at Walmart

1 serving of unpasteurized cinnamon honey

1 Gerbera daisy (“Midi Dark Fireball”) I was wearing in my hair in place of a May crown–er, April crown.

Unfortunately, I have no pictures since my parents took the camera today, but all of it’s been arranged very prettily on one of my mom’s “playing card” plates (the diamond one, because I couldn’t find the one with the suit of hearts).

Anyone who has an issue with this offering who isn’t Freyja can go fuck themselves, seriously.

Happy (early) May Day! (Or whichever festival you celebrate, if any).


How should one periphrase Freyja? By calling her the Goddess-Who-Knows-Her-Own-Worth, by calling her Righteous Anger, Warrior, Badass Who takes No Prisoners, Witch Who Dances With Abandon. By calling her the Giver, Lover of Many. By calling her Maker of Choices, Goddess Who Bargains With Her Own Body, She Who Will Not Be Slut-Shamed. By calling her the Goddess Who Can Herd Cats (or at least get two of them to work together) and by many other names.

Do you see what I did there? I is the cleverest, except I probably fucked it up. This is why I’m not a skald.

It’s International Women’s Day (and Friday, which here at this blog is always Freyja’s day…when it’s not Freyr’s day….) so I thought that today would be a great day to devote a whole post to talking about Freyja, because she’s so wonderful, isn’t she?

*sighs a little*

Freyja is….hm, I shouldn’t be so pressed for things to say, I am currently editing a Freyja devotional after all–which you will be able to purchase soon-ish, but not yet. Let’s try this again:

Freyja is the goddess who hijacks your dreams; she’ll show up, stark naked, falcon cloak draped over a chair, and give you a hundred watt smile as she assures you that everything will be okay, she’s got this.

And then you’ll wake up and be as confused as fuck (personal experience).

Freyja is the goddess who says “make your choices and OWN THEM” who says “stand up for yourself!” She’s a goddess who says “Desire is okay, and nothing to be ashamed about.” She likes whores–didn’t she barter her own body for a precious object? But don’t try to shame her because of it, her anger causes the very ground to shake and the other deities to quickly exclaim “I said no such thing, of course!”

She’s a goddess who cries tears of gold (or amber, depending on who you ask), a goddess who bestows wealth, of growth, a goddess makes the sea swell.

She’s a wanderer, a warrior, a wonder-worker, teacher of seidr. She gets a portion of those slain in battle (some say she gets first pick, funny how many seem to forget that she gets a portion at all).

She’s also an independent woman who functions perfectly well without a husband, this makes her the bane of viking dudebros who think of women as perpetual sammich makers and mead-bringers. Protip: Even Frigga, that exemplar of “proper” housewifely womanhood, is the Boss Lady of Asgard, especially when Odin’s not around (which is much of the time). I’d pay money to watch the dudebros squirm in her presence. I’d even sell tickets! Goddesses aren’t safe in general, that’s probably why dudebros make up stupid excuses like “only women should honour goddesses”, or they try to reduce her to a sex object. Some downplay her sexuality all together.

She’s a goddess of cats, and butterflies (Freyja’s hens) and sows. She shares the boar with her brother. Apparently she really likes strawberries, flowers (too many kinds to list) and linden trees, flax and hemp, and (although it’s probably the most anachronistic thing on here) my feeling is that she likes chocolate as well.

These are only a few of her aspects, and of the ones I’ve mentioned, you’ll notice I’ve only covered a couple in any depth (excluding other posts I’ve made in the past). Anyways, enjoy the rest of your day, or, however much of the day you have left, if any. (Seriously, stuff kept taking me away from writing this post, so I just finished it now.)